DKMI 2010 GRAMMY AWARDS FOLLOW-UP

Never one to advocate hit-and-runs, let me backtrack to where we left off (last post dated 2/1):

Being that this inaugural post comes post-Grammy’s, before Joan Rivers shares her fashion review tonight, let me just declare:

The Grammy’s are like the Rotten Tomatoes awards – the worst of the worst of fashion was on display last night.  Style-wise, 90% of musicians have none or just bad taste.  100% of the country music stars had dress disasters.

So, at the feared risk of single-handedly challenging my reputation, in protest of the E! Red Carpet Fashion Police and their voting both of my LEAST favorite looks – and country stars, nonetheless – as ‘Best Dressed’ – YES, REALLY! – I am ballsing up and offering a follow-up post to let you in on what I saw.  Know that my plan to comment on fashion still comes from a place of good intentions but it feels especially necessary to – sigh, once again – speak out.

As Tracy Chapman teaches in the song ‘Bridges,’ “Sometimes the best intentions still don’t make things right.”  The sentiment is directed, in this moment, to E!’s ‘Best Dressed’ winners Taylor Swift and Carrie Underwood.  And trust me, I NEVER thought I would be addressing anything about either (I really don’t care for country music, side for some Willy Nelson now and then).  To salvage face with the dress designers, whose overall aesthetic I respect, I ultimately chose NOT to specify their names/labels in this hallowed space.  Though, should you encourage me to include them within this blog, I am open to de-editing the below post for your benefit and opting for more transparency in future reports.  Because, sometimes the best intentions still don’t make things right.

Taylor Swift in XxxxxxxXxxxxx:

In this dress, with its sea green turquoise color, and, with her blonde locks wave-swept to the side, T. S. looks exactly like the mermaid from the Chicken of the Sea advertising campaign.  The large square cutout at the breast line is too harsh (emphasized by the non-proportionally narrow shoulder straps) for such a classically-silhouetted gown.  Part-nostalgic (the Chicken of the Sea campaign was conceived in the early ’50′s) and part-futuristic (high-sheen sequins and creative bust cutout) usually successfully breeds ‘modern,’ but here, the result is pageantry tackiness.  I suppose it is fitting that I find the dress awkwardly reminiscent of a fish out of water.

Carrie Underwood in Xxxxxxx by Xxxxxxx Xxxxxx:

C. U., in this design, looks like a 3/4′s-unwrapped mummy.  The asymmetrical silk bust line coupled with the odd-lengthed and -placed silver leather straps, flatten her chest a la bandages on a breast implant patient.  She likely tried to get out of the dress but had to keep it on once the straps became tangled and just too difficult to maneuver over the shoulder.  Here, again, old (mummies circa ancient Egypt) and forward-thinking (unusual placement of the straps) pair together as awkwardly as do [this dress'] silk chiffon and metallic leather.

In a karmic balancing effort, I’ve humbly opted to focus on two dress ‘standouts.’  Mind you that, at the Grammy’s, this title is difficult to place/award.  It is, of course, no coincidence that my appreciation of both selections hearkens back to my Michigan roots:

Fergie in Xxxxxx Xxxxx:

Sexy, sexy.  This blue dress shows off her great legs (it was near-to-vag short) and the gold strap detail, which looks best from behind, perfectly silhouettes her upper curves.  Let’s here it for maize and blue (University of Michigan, Ann Arbor is my alma matter).  And, my high school colors were gold and blue.  So there.

Ne-Yo in Xxxxx & Xxxxxxx-

Though his outfit was degraded as too ‘pimp’ by Joan Rivers and crew, the Detroit in me appreciates the white tie back to white shoes, and the black and white print scarf, tucked under the lapel of his tux.  His arrival and walk down the red carpet with two women notwithstanding, fine materials and proper fit trump any pre-conceived associations with this descriptor.  To whit, my father, a physician, embodies this principle, be he donning custom-fitted suits and handmade french-cuffed shirts or casual wear replete with brightly colored exotic accessories (snakeskin, eel, crocodile) and Coogi (or, to offer-up a more fashionable spin, Missoni-like) knits.

You can take the boy out of the inner-city but…

BONUS:

LOVED: Ashanti in Xxxx Xxxx Xxxxxxx, who shows class and cool can go hand-in-hand

LIKED: Keri Hilson in Xxxxx & Xxxxxxx, whose dress and jewelry paired together perfectly, though maybe better suited for an affair more classy than the Grammy Awards

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Tags: Ashanti, Carrie Underwood, Commentary, Detroit, Fashion, Fergie, Grammy, Grammy Awards, Joan Rivers, Keri Hilson, Ne Yo, New York City, Red Carpet, Taylor Swift